I can NOT wait for my new toy!! It should arrive some time next week. But aaarrrgghhh next week is so far awaaaayy!! Oh well, at least I have something to look forward to.


Anyway, how fortunate was I to have the presentation/training cancelled? Apparently my manager was flat out with his work that it just wasn't possible for us to prepare a presentation (i.e. an internal training session for the tax team).

I've just found out today that my performance appraisal will be held next week on Tuesday, 11 AM. I totally have no idea what performance appraisals are like. One thing for sure, I'll be in a room with Richard (one of the directors) and Keith (my direct manager).

Aaaarrrgghhh ma new tooooyy! Ma new tooooyyy!! Come to mama dahliiiinnn!! In case you're curious what my new toy is, here are some clues:

• It's white
• It slides
• It plays music

Labels: Daily Ramblings

Andy wrote me an email. Here's part of what he said:

I know what we said Friday and I stand by that but being realistic I am off to the UK in 6 weeks and all that other stuff. So it would be great to stay in touch but we both know friends it has to be.

I couldn't agree more. There's no way in the world that we can be more than friends. Having said that, though, I'm glad for what happened on Friday night. Thank God I didn't let things go too far, otherwise I'd be crushed by now.

Bukannya aku tak tahu, kau sudah ada yang punya
Karena telah kau bisikkan cintamu padaku, ku tau engkau berdusta
Namun ku tak mau mengerti, selama kau masih bersamaku
Karena ku suka, ku butuh cinta yang pernah hilang dariku

Cinta ini kadang-kadang tak ada logika
Berisi semua hasrat dalam hati
Ku hanya ingin dapat memiliki
Dirimu hanya untuk sesaat

Anyway, the atmosphere in the office has been quite different now that he left. I can't bear staring at his empty desk, otherwise that slight feeling of emptyness would come up again and I'd end up shedding a few tears.

Anyway, it's performance appraisal next week! Oh, and not to mention the presentation that my manager and I need to do for the whole tax team! The worst part of it is that I have no clue on the topic that they want us to present. It has something to do with tax ramifications and debt insolvencies. Kyaaaaaa!! Bagaimana nih?? Mati lah gua!!

Labels: Confessions

Yesterday was Andy's (a.k.a Dave, so don't get confused if I use these two names interchangeably) last day at work as he's going back to his homeland (the UK) in two months, so right after work everyone from our firm went to Dockside for drinks. At first I thought I was gonna hang around with them for a few hours and leave before 10pm. However, I stayed with them until 6am in the morning! Haha! So that's 13 hours of partying!


Anyway, here are some notable stuffs to mention when we were at Dockside:

• When I was chatting with Dave, he revealed to me of what the managers and directors think of the three graduates (me, Conal and Vivienne). Apparently he's been intrigued by me, and his personal thought was that I was the one who stood out and had the most potential to go far and succeed in my career (not that the other two don't have potential, but what he's saying is that I was the best out of the grads). To my surprise, the managers and directors agreed with him (he specifically mentioned Mike, Phil, and AJ). Oh gosh, I don't believe this, do they really see that big of a potential in me? Cos I don't even believe in myself that much. I mean, I always try to do the best I can in everything that I do, but I don't see myself as the smart and clever girl with all the hidden potentials. Oh, and besides, berhubung gua masuk kerja tuh telat mulu (whereas the two other grads always come VERY early!) masa sih gua yg terbaik di antara kita bertiga? Hehe.
  
• Trus2, ada dancing session-nya juga dooong! Rich (one of the directors) refused to dance but I managed to drag him along. Gua cekikikan ngeliat dia joget, lucu sih, hehe. I'm gonna dub him Rich the Dancing Tax Director when I get back to work next week.
• Nah, pas lagi dancing nih, Conal surprised me cos he actually knows how to dance and throw the girl and spin her around and make her feel like she's in a rollercoaster (although he was kinda drunk that time, lol). Yg anehnya nih, he gave me a few kuchizuke when we were dancing (di pipi doang kok!) but he didn't do that to Vivienne or Kirralee! Trus juga pas lg dance gitu, he was kind of makin a move on me, tp gk gua bales, heheh. Tau ah, drunk doang kali ya dia. But but, pas di kantor juga dia bae banget ke gw & did some really thoughtful stuffs for me (I've never seen him do that to anyone else), trus kadang juga kalo gua tatapan ama dia (ceileee), rasanya ada sesuatu di matanya that makes 'em show that extra little thing for me. He doesn't look at Viv in that way! Oh BTW, Conal started working in our firm 4 weeks after me and Vivienne. Sebelum dia dateng, gua ngerasa apa gua kemudaan ya umur 20 udah kerja sebagai tax professional, soalnya Vivienne tuh umurnya 27 (but she looks 24) and the rest are in their 30s, 40s, and 50s!! Nah, pas Conal dateng, ternyata dia umurnya 21, and oh YAY I was so relieved I'm not too young to be here anymore! ^_^
• Oh, I can't remember how many rounds of drinks I had while we were at the Dockside. Awalnya sih gua itung, 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. tapi setelah itu gk bisa kehitung euy, I think I had quite a lot, tapi kyknya gk sampe 10 deh.
  

After a few hours at Dockside, we moved on to Chicago:

• Nothing special here, cuma makan2 doang, ngobrol2 tentang berbagai hal, AND minum2 lagi. Meskipun gua udah gk haus, tetep aja mereka ngebeliin gua minum, yaudah deh gua bilang aja Midori, enak sih, hihi.

Nah trus kita naik taksi ke Mini Bar di Courtenay:

• Awalnya kan ada berapa belas orang yg dateng, tapi pas ke Mini Bar tinggal 7 orang yg ngikut.
• I dunno whose idea was it to go to Mini Bar, cos tempatnya bener2 mini bo! Sempit banget dah.
• Trus gak tau gimana ceritanya kok tiba2 Conal menghilang gitu. He told no one that he was leaving.

Setelah ngerasa kesempitan banget, kita pindah ke Vespa Lounge deh:

• Nah, sekarang tinggal 4 orang, sisanya pada pulang kecapean cos kira2 udah jam 11.30pm. Tapi setelah setengah jam-an, Rich akhirnya pulang juga, 'n abis itu tinggal bertiga deh.
  
• Now this was where we spent the rest of the night. We danced, drank some more, and talked some more. Emma got quite drunk after a while, but to my utter astonishment I didn't get tipsy at all. Jeez, my body tolerates alcohol really well; we were all surprised.
  
• When I was talking with Dave, awalnya sih ngobrol2 biasa aja, tapi tiba2 dia bilang "You know.. I think you're beautiful.." *jegeeerrrrrr*
• Dia bilang ke gua that he really likes me ever since I walked into the office (now I know I'm right about my suspicion that he likes me -- cos I caught him checking me out several times, hehe). Yang gilanya nih, dia tuh udah punya istri!! (tp gk punya anak kok). Oh, and he's 33, although he looks a few years younger than that (not that age matters). So anyway, he feels really guilty for having this sort of feeling towards me, and that he doesn't want to feel that way about me at all cos it's not right -- he's married! As for me, I really like him for how smart he is, how nice and helpful he is towards me, how he goes along really well with just about everyone in the office, and I love his sense of humour. However, after having known from the beginning that he's married, the feeling that I've developed for him is more like that towards a big brother. He was about to cross the line when he tried to kuchizuke me (yup, on la bouche), but I whispered "you have a wife, Dave.." and he backed off. Tapi ya wateper lah, we still did stuffs that made me have butterflies in my stomach and that warm, tingling and loving sensation that I haven't felt in two years.
  

Pas udah jam 6.15am, kita bertiga cabut. Emma cabut duluan naek taksi, trus Andy nganterin gua pulang naek taksi juga. Hwaaa, I'm gonna miss him soooo much, both at work and outside work. At work, no one's gonna sit next to me after he leaves, hix hix. No one's gonna pick on me or play tricks on me anymore, hix.. hix. He wished things were different with the whole situation, and he said I'm killing him for the fact that he wants me so much but he can't have me (well, of course he can, but that would make me him cheat on his wife and I don't want that). I wish things were different too, hix hix.. hix.. Il m'a dit aussi que je le manquerai tellement, qu'il pensera de moi toujours, et qu'il ne m'oubliera pas. Huaaaa! He wants us to stay in touch though, as I'm obviously his favorita and he'd like to stay updated with my career progression too. And who knows, as I'm pretty keen to visit London, I might go there one day and he can come and visit me from Essex with his dream Aston Martin car (oh, and Adam my childhood buddy can visit me too from Huddersfield, haha!).

Ya sudah deh, I guess I should stop here. Really, if you've actually read this whole story, you must have nothing better to do, hehe. But congratulations and thanks for making it to the end! xoxo

Labels: Confessions, Friends, Fun Times

I dedicate this quote to those of you who consider yourself a hopeless romantic, because I'm one too :)

Barangsiapa sangat mencintai seseorang kemudian ia menjaga diri dari perbuatan maksiat dan ia menyimpan cintanya sampai mati, maka ia telah syahid. (HR Al-Hakim)

Thank God I was strong enough to do the right thing (especially the "maksiat" bit) .. and that I have this hadeeth to back me up :)

Labels: Confessions

Ladies, feel free to copy and paste this questionnaire into your own blog. So much for my hiatus declaration, huh? Lol! Looks like I'm still going to be around after all :) Oh by the way Happy Easter to those who celebrate it. Personally I celebrate Easter by shopping and shopping and eating lots and lotsa those Easter egg chocs! Yummeee!

1. What is your personal style? ... mmm depends on my mood, really. Sometimes I like to dress casually, other times I like to dress up a bit & either be girly, sophisticated, cuek-ish, punk-ish, etc.
2. What's your beauty regime? ... wash my face both in the morning & at night, and slap on some moisturiser & rosehip oil.
3. So what moisturiser do you use? ... Epiderm Derma Butter.
4. Cleanser? ... Olay facial wash.
5. Exfoliator? ... Epiderm Microdermabrasion Pro Treatment.
6. Foundation? ... Maybelline Wonder Finish in Sandy Beige.
7. Face powder? ... Marcks Venus (--> Indo-style! ^.^ )
8. Lipstick? ... Revlon Moisturous Lipcolor and Maybelline.
9. Lip gloss? ... Bonnebell.
10. Blusher? ... Yves Saint-Laurent.
11. Eyeshadow? ... Yves Saint-Laurent & Elizabeth Arden.
12. Mascara? ... Maybelline Lash-Discovery is my all-time fave!!
13. So which of these products can't you live without? ... Epiderm Derma Butter (the best moisturiser ever with a heavenly scent), Epiderm Microdermabrasion, Trilogy Rosehip Oil (it really IS effective in vanishing my acne scars), face powder, blusher, and my beloved Revlon Moisturous Lipcolor in Tawny Dew or Mauve So Moist.
    
14. So do you spend AGES on looking good? ... only when I feel like it :)
15. And do you spend tons of $$$ on looking good? ... not really.
16. What sort of look do you go for? (eg. glam, sexy, rock, natural) ... natural.
17. Now let's talk about hair. What sort of hair do you possess? ... Black, medium-length, layered, coarse, thick, hard to manage.
18. When's the last time you had a haircut? ... geez I really don't remember, it was about 6 months ago I guess. Oh but a few days ago I cut my own fringe, does that count?
19. How do you style your hair? ... I normally straighten it the day after I wash it, then when it gets oily after 2 days I tie it.
20. Now now, let's talk about your body. What type of body are you born with? ... slim & slender. I can get away with whatever food I want and not get fat. Yay I'm blessed!
21. Height? ... 166 cm.
22. Weight? ... 50 kg.
23. BMI? ... 18.4 (--> see, unlike what people think, I'm not underweight, ha!)
    
24. What exercises do you do to stay fit? ... I do light cardio exercises a few times a week, plus I'm starting on some abdominal workouts.
25. When you go shopping, what do you tend to look for? ... I used to be obsessed about earrings, but not anymore. These days I like to browse for winter coats, skirts, shorts, and I've developed a recent obsession towards designer bags (gosh I luv Juicy Couture and D&G, they're so tempting.. yet so expensive!! If only my parents still live in Paris.. mmmm..)
26. Would you go for a Brazilian? ... ain't they painful? But hey, if that dumbass, airheaded Paris Hilton can stand the pain then why can't I? ;)
    
27. Do you always follow the latest trends in fashion? ... thank God no!
    
28. Do you think fashion models should come in a larger size? ... heh, I don't care. It all depends on the designer's tastes and the style of the clothing I guess.
29. Do you and your main group of friends have the same taste in fashion? ... once again, thank God no! hehe.
30. Last but not least, would you prefer a truly masculine boyfriend or a super-stylish one? ... 70% masculine, 30% stylish and fashion-conscious.
    

Labels: Blog Homeworks