This is a poem that my baby wrote for me while we were out on a date. I must say he's a good poet, for the fact that he wrote this in 5 minutes while I was in front of him:

40 reasons why Shrek is BAD for me!

1. He's arrogant
2. He's cocky and so full of himself
   
3. Physically aggressive
4. Tends to bring you down
5. Racist jokes (they ain't even funny!)
6. Offensive sometimes
7. Occasional bad breath
8. FAT (Astaghfirullah ya Allah, forgive me for mocking him like this)
9. VERY stingy
10. NOT a gentleman at all
11. No sense of style apart from professional wear (Black sweatshirt & Converse & jeans the WHOLE time! Helloo!)
12. He thinks he's the best, i.e. "larger than life"
13. He thinks he's better than everyone else
14. Grumpy for no reason
15. Spends A LOT, especially on fancy suits. He should really save up for his future!
16. The way he slurps some food... eww eww! A complete turn-off!
17. Selfish
18. He thinks he's the most important and doesn't see other people as important
19. Uncaring
20. Unattentive
21. He's TOO BUSY! He's got no time for a proper girlfriend
22. He doesn't keep his word. (e.g. swimming a couple of km's a week? yea right!)
23. He never loved me
24. He was never in love with me
25. He sucks
26. He stinks sometimes
27. He lets out a series of smelly, huge breaths when he dances. A HUGE turn-off! Especially when we dance together
28. Heck, the way he dances! It's kinda embarrassing!
29. He wanted us to stay friends. But WTF, I haven't heard from him in a long time! He's probably busy fukcing other sluts right now.
30. He didn't care about our relationship, otherwise he would've made an effort for it to work out and he would've asked for a 2nd chance when I broke up with him.
31. He took advantage of me, and my money!
32. Everyone else thinks he's not worth it and that he's not good enough for me
33. Not a lot of people like him
    
34. He looks 10 years older than his age
35. He's huge! A giant!
    
36. He's not even sexually attractive!
37. He ain't thoughtful
38. He's not musically and/or artistically talented
39. He's not romantic AT ALL
40. He had me. Yet he "threw" me away
    

I feel so insecure about my relationship with Shrek. There's this girl whom he likes to go out to movies alone with. Although he told me that he doesn't even consider her a friend because he feels like he couldn't trust her completely, I don't get why he wouldn't let her know that he's no longer single and that he's got me as his girlfriend (oh btw I bumped into both of them the other day when they were queueing to get movie tickets, and he introduced me to her). I'm 95% certain that this girl likes him! So if he keeps on acting like he's single then who knows one day she might make a move on him!

I've been asking him about her, I know it's intrusive and that he hates it when I do it. I don't want this to damage our relationship either. He wants me to trust him cos he trusts me completely, and he said that if I assume that he's gonna hurt me from the beginning then we're doomed from the start. I know this is true, but how can I trust him when he's acting like he's single and that he doesn't want to acknowledge to his friends that I'm his girlfriend?

So I found an article below, I thought it's a really good article and it totally reflects my current situation (except for the fact that Shrek and I aren't husband and wives, hehe). I will try to step back and give him some space. But it still doesn't solve the issue as to why he doesn't wanna let people know that he's taken and that I'm his girlfriend..

-----

The biggest killers of many relationships are a lack trust, jealousy and a lack of space. Many wives do not realise that the more they watch a spouse, question him and want to know about the routine things he does, is the more unattractive they appear, the more claustrophobic the relationship becomes and the quicker they send him into the arms of someone else.

Many partners do not also appreciate that they cannot be all things to their spouses who need stimulation, perhaps intellectual, leisure or otherwise, from others. If couples love one another and trust one another there is no need to spy on one another. Problems begin when there has not been much attention and appreciation between couples and suddenly one partner seems to be giving that attention somewhere else. It is easy to demand that a partner stop such connections but much harder to make it stick because something could be missing from the home and the action will merely be repeated quietly later on because the real cause is not being addressed.

Instead of asking any questions, let it be and begin to review your parts in the relationship. Could you do more things together? When did you last praise him? Or he praise you? When did you last send gifts to one another, play silly games, have a night of wild passionate love? What I am trying to say is that many relationships die of sheer boredom, of taking each other for granted and doing the same old things all the time. Along comes a person who seems exciting, who makes the partner feel relaxed and different and whammo! Problems afoot. But focusing on that person will not make the problems go away, if there are any. He will just switch to someone else down the line because you would be focusing on the symptoms, not the cause, whatever they are.

He has been open about talking to her. He hasn't hidden it. Over to you now to have the courage to examine what could be missing by having some communication with him and start focusing on you both. It is easy to start blaming others for things going wrong, but the third party is never important. It really is about the two of you and what you wish for your relationship. You cannot afford for him to see you as unattractive (you mentioned him getting 'an earful'). If that is all he has to look forward to, he will look elsewhere. Once attraction goes, it cannot be manufactured and often couples concentrate on the negatives instead of simply loving and valuing their partners.

Look at it realistically: So he answers all your questions and tells you what they have been talking about and you're still not happy? What then? You cannot curtail his movements like a child and you will only make the situation worse with your negative stance. I would ask him just one question: "When can we go away for a wild weekend together? We need some time to ourselves, just do something different, don't you think?" Then also have a long chat on the weekend to see how you both can get more from the relationship and build it from there. Otherwise any other negative action will merely leave you feeling stressed, anxious, vulnerable and very insecure as you cannot watch him 24/7 and he might simply retreat from you to avoid the confrontations.

Article by Elaine Sihera.

We had dinner together at Cafe Pasha, and afterwards I thought he just wanted to go straight home, but instead he took me to the Waterfront. We sat down, cuddled in each other's arms for I dunno how long (maybe almost an hour). The air was tolerable and not chilly either so it was a very nice and calm night.

Like I said before, he's been making moves to kiss me on the lips but I wasn't ready. But tonight, I finally leaned towards his face and at last.. we kissed. Then it started raining. Aah finally a kiss under the rain!

It was an amazingly wonderful, warm and sunny day today (considering how awful it's been these past few days). Shrek and I met up today for yum cha (Viv and Scott were meant to come too, but they couldn't make it cos Scott was sick). While waiting for the food to arrive, I asked him "what's new with you?" Then he said "err.. I don't know... I might have a new girlfriend today but it depends on what you're gonna tell later on."

After yum cha, and as usual, we went to Kaffe Eis to get some gelato and then walked along the Waterfront.

We sat down, and I finally told him about my "decision". I told him how I realised that I didn't wanna lose him ever since he told me that he was leaving TEAM, then I said something along the lines of: "So I've decided that.. (his heart must be thumping at this point).. I wanna be with you". Afterwards we hugged, cheek-kissed (I think he did try to kiss me on the lips at some point, but I turned my head so he kissed my cheek instead, cos I want my first kiss with him to be very special), cuddled so tightly, and we even took pictures of us together (hey, what do you expect from two vain individuals?). But sorry I ain't gonna post 'em here!

Now that it's much clearer in terms of where Shrek and Donkey are going (i.e. we've held hands in public etc.) I've decided that on Sunday, I'm gonna tell him my "decision" as to whether I want him to be my baby or not.

Donkey: Next time we meet, I need to tell you something.
Ogre: That sounds serious, your HBV isn't getting worse is it?
Donkey: No, it's not that, it's about us.
Ogre: Is it a good something or a bad something?
Donkey: I'm not telling, I'll keep you in suspense for a while. I've thought this through last night, and I've made my "decision". I just thought I'd let you know so you can stop wondering.

-----

Donkey: What are you makin for lunch baby boi?
Ogre: Chicken tortellini and chicken salad (--> yes he loves cooking!)
Donkey: Yumm.. I hope you can cook them for me one day.
Ogre: So do I. I guess that depends on what your decision is that I'll find out on Sunday.
Donkey: So that means you're not an unconditional giver? :(
Ogre: Haha I'm just teasing you, I like to cook and I like you, so I'd love to cook for you :)
Donkey: Yay, I'm so lucky to have you!
Ogre: I know you are, I'm lucky to have me too, and I'm lucky cos you're gonna tell me something on Sunday.
Donkey: You're not even saying that you're lucky to have me :( Aren't you scared that what I'm gonna say might disappoint you or tear you to pieces?
Ogre: I don't know if I have you, I hope I do though, and I am scared but fear and courage sound the same so until I know I will just hope for the best :)
Donkey: So what do you think my "decision" is?
Ogre: I don't speculate about people's feelings like that, I know what I want you to decide, but I can't control what you choose :( But I think your decision will make us happy.
Donkey: And whatever happens, I want us to still be close partners in crime, okay? I know what my decision is, but I still don't know how to tell you though..
Ogre: Okay, well you have 2 days to figure out how to tell me and we will always be close, so don't worry :)

Awww isn't he sweet? Just so you know, I've already decided that I want him to be my baby, he should've figure this out too cos I've already called him "baby" or "baby boi" instead of "Shrek" or "Ogre" or "Ogre boi".

It's cheap movie day today, so I asked SHREK out to see Kung Fu Panda today. He gave me a big hug when I arrived (aww sooo schweet!!)

The movie itself was sooo cute and funny. However, in the middle of the movie I got distracted. What happened was, I was putting my hands on my handbag (which was placed on my lap). At that time he was sitting on my right side. Suddenly, he reached his left hand towards my right hand, and sort of tickled it at first and opened it wide enough for him to slid his hand in mine. Then he grabbed my hand, carried it over to his lap, held it tight, and played with it by softly rubbing my fingers with his other hand. Kyaaaaaa!! For a while I couldn't concentrate on the movie at all! This totally sent shivers down my whole body, it felt soooo soothing, and by this move, I totally felt like I belong to him now.

After the movie, we went to La Casa Pasta for dinner. It was great! And afterwards we walked to the bus stop. While walking I did think "when is he gonna grab my hand again?" and mid-way he finally did! Unfortunately his bus came first so he left first, but gave a cute peck on my cheek before he did :) Aah.. wonderful night :)